good deal... i was going to suggest laying down w/ her (i know.. she’s in a crib) and giving her a lil backrub til she falls asleep, but looks like you got it. that used to always put me to sleep too, so we’d end up both napping the afternoon away.

I actually found your blog by Googling the Ferber Method. I was thinking about trying it with my eight month old because he has such a hard time going out at night; he sounds much like your little girl. But after reading your entry (and already knowing that I can’t stand to hear him cry), I think I’ll give your method a shot tonight. Wish me luck!

Laura,

i do wish you the best of luck! although our little one figured out pretty quickly that when she fell asleep i would leave. so she refused to fall asleep with my little trick after a couple weeks. now we’re back to letting her cry. as much as i hate to do that.

UPDATE

this will probably change, but has worked for about a week now. we sit in the rocking chair (after reading a story and having a bottle) until she falls asleep. usually within 10-15 minutes after the bottle. i rub her tummy and legs while we’re sitting there and don’t put her down until i know she’s really asleep. she wakes a little when i put her down, but i rub her tummy and stay by her until she is once again sound asleep.

The ferber method is killing me and its only the first night. She finally gave up but i think it was killing my whole house not to go in there! She is one year and i was googling Ferber Method also and a lot of sights talk about under development of independence and so on because of the emotional effects the ferber method causes. I’ve tried the whole book bottle massage thing and she is just to stubborn. For a year now i usually fall asleep in my bed while she wiggles and plays with her toes until she puts herself to sleep beside me. Are there any other suggestions? Im not sure if she’ll ever sleep in a crib and that is not my idea of a good night sleep!

I have 2 children, my 8 yr old was up every 2 hours for 5 months. My doctor suggested the Ferber method which worked like a dream after 2 nights. THANK GOD FOR SWEET SLEEP. It is never easy for any parent, but in the long run, parents who rock, massage, sing their children to sleep on a regular basis will be doing so for a very long time (just wait until you try to get them out of the crib). I think I am a better mom after 8 hours of sleep. Different things work form different people, but I swear by it. We started on our 6 mo. old last night, I hope it goes as smoothly. Olivia, don’t give up, I bet after 2 or 3 more nights it will be a non-issue. Do whatever you have to to get your youngster out of your bed, the longer you wait, the harder it will be!
GOOD LUCK EVERYONE.

I began just laying my daughter down while still awake and after we had already established a schedule at 6 weeks and she has been sleeping through the night ever since. Its a great method. I recommend using this method when you have a schedule established including feeding, babies like to know whats coming next. Worked like a charm for me.

If anyone has read the Ferber method and has an answer for me. I’m going to start letting my little guy cry. He just doesn’t know how to go to sleep on his own...and I think he needs to learn to do that. Anyway I put him down and he cries until he’s exhausted then I go in and put his pacifier in his mouth and he goes right to sleep. My question is, am I messing up the method if when I go into to comfort him I give him his pacifier?

I have three children, none of which I have had to let scream until they were so exhausted that they fell asleep. If we were meant to let our children scream themselves to sleep, then thier crying wouldn’t bother us half as much as it does. I am not saying it is always easy, but what part of parenting is? Responding to your child’s cries teaches him that he can trust you. If you can get your child to go to sleep while rubbing or patting him, eventually you will be able to just rest your hand on him and he will fall asleep, then you will be able to just sit next to the crib or bed, then across the room, then in the doorway and eventually you will be able to just leave. Good luck to all of you. Remember that your children love and trust you, and just want to know that you are there.

It’s okay that they cry Anna. You should read up on the Ferber method. It says to go in and confort your child so that they know that you love them and so that they know that you are there. I think it also teaches them that they can’t just get what they want by throwing a tantrum. There’s a difference between an “I need you because something is wrong” cry and an “I want to get my way, I’m mad” cry. I’d never let my baby cry if he was hurt or sick - but when he’s tired...he needs to know how to put himself to sleep.

We did Cry It Out for our son at 3 months, and now at 5 months old he still sleeps through the night. When he would cry, we would go in his room and comfort him (i.e. give him his pacifier or stroke his hair) and he’d fall right back to sleep. He didn’t lose any trust in us because he still cries for food at 5 am every morning (he sleeps from 9pm-5am), and knows that I will feed him!

The Ferber Method does not say that they should cry until they are so exhausted that they pass out. I started the method with my two year old at 6 months. It worked like a charm. She knows that if she needs something in the middle of the night all she has to do is cry or say Mommy or Daddy. If she doesn’t need anything she is awake for a few moments, giggles, and plays then goes right back to sleep. She has been sleeping through the night for a long time and let me tell you my husband and I are better parents and partners because of a good nights sleep. I agree that it is not easy to hear your child cry, but it seems to me that it is easier to get a good nights sleep all the time then to listen and comfort for a few nights.